Tuesday, December 15, 2009

"So let it be written; so let it be done."

December 15, 2009

These iconic words, spoken so regally by Hollywood's play-pharaohs, suit my purposes nicely. These kings walked the ornate hallways of Egypt, surrounded by slaves, adored by countrymen, and changing the course of history one edict at a time. We're similar, they and I, though you may not think so. I may not be filthy rich, but my halls are ornate. With obstacles, that is. Blocks, dolls, dropped food, emptied laundry baskets, and capsized toy boxes usually litter my home by nine a.m. My maid cleans these items up every night. She's great! She leaves the house immaculate and ready for next-day's business before the clock strikes twelve. The doctor keeps trying to get me to take medication to get rid of her, but I won't do it.

I am also adored by my countrymen (and women). Granted, all of my countrymen are short, but this fact is not a problem for me, as many rulers of note, rose to fame while ruling peoples short of stature. I give you the munchkins and their Good Witch of the East, the Oompa-Loompas and Willie Wanka, the Lilliputians and Gulliver--see, size really DOESN'T matter!

SO WHY IN THE NAME OF DAD'S PAJAMAS AM I ABOUT TO CUT COOKIES OUT OF MY LIFE?! Hi. My name's Sarah, and I did not have a cookie today. But I did have a Berry Ice Cream Sunday, so ah, where exactly do I stand on the success plateau today? Obviously, I need some guidelines.

Hence, I look to the pharaohs. I'm gonna make some edicts of my own. And since my husband would no doubt be VERY disturbed if I started carving my dietary laws in our drywall, my blog has just been nominated as my personal pyramid. I'm going to make one change to my life every week, and in making that change, I am going to pursue it with absolute commitment. Ideally, this time next year, I will have implemented 52 really great lifestyle changes, and followed them cumulatively to effect something very like the parting of the Red Sea.

This week, my lifestyle change is going to seem absolutely menial. It is a habit that I habitually put off, forget, practice irregularly, and profane. I say I'll do it after breakfast, and then I don't get to finish breakfast. I say I'll do it after the kids are down for naps, and then I get caught up with the cocoa and cookie thing I obviously have a huge issue with. I tell myself I'm doing pretty good if I did it 4 days out of 7. I tell myself that it really doesn't matter that much.

I am GOING to take my multivitamin EVERYDAY.

With my cookie.


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